The Pressure We Put on Ourselves During the Summer Holidays

I was chatting to a mum recently and she said, "I feel like we've hardly done anything this summer."

It made me smile because I can remember feeling exactly the same when my children were younger. I'd get to the middle of August and start thinking about all the things we hadn't done. We hadn't been to the beach as much as I'd planned. The craft activities I'd bought were still sitting in the cupboard. I'd seen all these lovely ideas online that I was definitely going to do... and somehow we'd ended up eating fish and chips on the sofa watching a film instead.

I remember feeling guilty, like I should have done more.

Looking back now, I realise my children never saw the list I'd made in my head. They never knew we'd missed three trips to the beach or that I'd forgotten about the baking I'd planned. They just knew they'd spent time with us.

One of the things I hear from parents all the time during the summer holidays is, "I feel like I'm not doing enough."

I wonder if that's because we compare our ordinary days to everyone else's highlight reel. We see the family days out. The matching outfits. The beautiful picnics. The smiling children.

What we don't see is the argument that happened before they left the house, the child who refused to join in, or the parent who was ready to turn the car round before they'd even reached their destination.

Real family life isn't like that.

Sometimes it's a last-minute trip for an ice cream because nobody can agree on anything else. Sometimes it's everybody staying in their pyjamas until lunchtime. Sometimes it's saying, "Let's just walk the dog," because everyone needs some fresh air. Looking back now, those ordinary moments are the ones I remember most.

One thing I've learnt over the years is that children don't need us to create magical memories every single day.

They need to feel safe. They need to laugh. They need to know it's OK if every day isn't exciting. Most of all, they need parents who aren't carrying the weight of trying to make every moment perfect.

So if you're looking back over the holidays and thinking, "I should have done more," can I gently remind you of something?

Your children probably aren't keeping score.

They're not counting how many days out you've had. They're not comparing your summer to another family's. They're simply growing up in your family, with all its funny moments, messy moments and memories that you'll probably laugh about one day.

If you're looking for a few simple ideas for these last couple of weeks of the holidays, I've put together my Summer Survival Kit with activities that are easy to pull out on those "I'm bored" days. No complicated preparation, no expensive equipment, just simple ways to connect and keep everyone a little more regulated.

And if today ends with fish fingers for tea, a film on the sofa and children who tell you they've had a lovely day...

I'd call that a pretty successful summer.